It is finally official, you have signed your divorce papers. Everything has been finalized and your marriage is now over. So, what do you do next? And how do you get over the fact that you probably still do not feel great about it even though you knew it was needed? While everyone's divorce story is unique, the methods that they use to help them move on and recover after divorce do have some similarities. Today, we dive in to share these tips so you can take your next steps post-divorce with confidence.
Step One: Give Yourself Permission to Feel Your Feelings
According to therapists, going through a divorce is a lot like grieving. You will feel intense emotions at times. Other times you may feel completely fine. It is totally normal to go through those ups and downs, so give yourself the permission to feel those feelings. Storing them down inside you does you no good as they will come out eventually.
There are many ways to work through your feelings as well. You can speak to a therapist or enroll yourself in a new healthy activity. You do need to work through those feelings to move on, so do your best to make this a priority.
Step Two: Rediscover Yourself
Ask yourself the question "who am I?" Lean into that question and start to try new things that you like to do. Maybe you have always wanted to pick up a new hobby or travel. Find what it is that interests you and start to engage with it. We compromise a lot during a relationship, so ask yourself if you gave up anything to appease your spouse. Can you reconnect with those things?
Step Three: Dare to Be Alone
Being alone does not mean being isolated or lonely. Instead, it means choosing to date yourself for some time as opposed to dating again. Society is much more accommodating to single people now than ever before. It is not taboo to sit at a restaurant by yourself or spend the day alone exploring a city.
Step Four: Book a Fun Trip For Yourself
If you just got through a divorce, you are most likely ready for a vacation. Take some time off of work just for yourself to go somewhere you always wanted to go. You could choose to go with friends, but there is also something really healing about doing it yourself - even if it is just for part of the trip.
Step Five: Do Not Be Afraid to Put Yourself Out There Again
While it is important to take time to process your divorce, you will know when you are ready to date again. Do not be afraid to date, meet up with someone you have always thought was interesting for coffee, or get on dating apps.
If you need help navigating your divorce or modifying part of your divorce decree, contact our office online to schedule a consultation.